Understand the reasons behind the conflicts that shake relationships during the pandemic
The pandemic of the new coronavirus directly impacted the lives of the population, bringing challenges of all kinds for those who needed to isolate themselves socially and stay indoors. In this sense, many couples living together felt the effects of constant coexistence, questioning the relationship in several aspects.
During the quarantine, some Brazilian states even registered records of requests for divorce. In social networks, there were many reports of people who chose to end a relationship or engaged in extra-marital relationships – facilitated by virtual media, such as websites and applications.
Conflicting couples in isolation
The reason why these conflicts arise is, first, the very experience of social isolation, which brought about concrete changes in the couple’s routine. “We are still learning to adapt and deal with these changes in the way we live,” says psychologist Sirlene Ferreira.
When there are no pre-established and well-defined habits, that is, a combination between those who live together, the tendency is for disagreements to surface. According to Sirlene, the problems faced by couples in this period range from sharing professional matters and domestic activities to the loss of privacy for each one, strange as it may seem.
“Despite spending a lot of time together, there may be no space for intimacy between the two. The time is dedicated to professional demands, to the care of the home and children exclusively”, explains the psychologist. She also shows that, when there is no agreement on the division of domestic activities, the couple ends up spending more time in fights and arguments.
Differences and similarities
Another point raised by the psychologist Regina Tavares concerns the fact that both have more moments to assess their differences or similarities. Because of this, quarantine can even enhance issues and problems that already existed between the two.
To learn how to better deal with these disagreements during isolation, the main recommendations remain clear and direct communication, a routine of mutual agreement, a balanced division of tasks and intimate time for the couple. The specialist Sirlene also brings other tips for couples to preserve their relationship. See below:
The absence of dialogue can have numerous negative effects on any relationship. This is because it leaves room for interpretations about the other’s desires and thoughts that do not necessarily correspond to what is actually in the person’s mind. Good communication is vital to avoid disagreements between the couple.
Know more: Cultivate your relationship through dialogue
Knowing how to put yourself in the other’s shoes within a relationship helps in understanding that individuals have with each other. Together with dialogue, empathy helps to avoid hurt and not only understand but also accept differences between you and your partner.
Fear and insecurity during isolation can make reactions happen out of proportion. Thus, self-control is important in order not to let the moment of uncertainty that we live through have a negative charge between the couple, avoiding exaggeratedly negative receptions in any conflict.
Meditation is one of the most practical advice for establishing individual balance and expanding it into relationships. Through it, it is possible to develop ways of the mind to deal with stress or negative influences, which is very beneficial for the couple.
It is also important to remember that specialized mediation is always an option. The couple need not be ashamed to seek professional assistance to help with conflict management or readaptation to this new routine, if necessary.
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